Mariah Carey
At the 2000 World Music Awards, Mariah Carey was named the 'Best Selling Female Artist of the Millennium'. That's right, the millennium. At this point, it would have been entirely understandable if lovely, dappy Mariah had decided to retire to one of her many castles, to pass the rest of her days stroking kittens and catching sneaky glimpses of her perfect bum in strategically positioned mirrors.
But no. Instead she hangs around to this day, releasing miserably bland tunes. She has an absolutely perfect voice. When record execs autotune Britney, or whoever, they are aiming for the clarity and tone of Mariah. My god, can she sing. However it doesn't really excuse the dire pop shit she comes out with.
Probably Mariah's finest moment was in the early 90s when she covered Badfinger's 'Without You' and the world was transfixed by her voice. Shortly afterward lazy executives realised she could sing the phone book as long as it had a solid RnB groove, the words 'love' and 'boy' inserted a random but reasonably high number of times, and a video featuring her bum – Middle American vegetables were absolutely guaranteed to buy it.
You often hear RnB superstars and other singers praising Mariah to the skies. And this is because her voice is incredible. But her mind is absolutely tiny and she's been directly responsible for exploding a genre of music which can be roughly categorised as 'bland RnB'. It's a shame.
But no. Instead she hangs around to this day, releasing miserably bland tunes. She has an absolutely perfect voice. When record execs autotune Britney, or whoever, they are aiming for the clarity and tone of Mariah. My god, can she sing. However it doesn't really excuse the dire pop shit she comes out with.
Probably Mariah's finest moment was in the early 90s when she covered Badfinger's 'Without You' and the world was transfixed by her voice. Shortly afterward lazy executives realised she could sing the phone book as long as it had a solid RnB groove, the words 'love' and 'boy' inserted a random but reasonably high number of times, and a video featuring her bum – Middle American vegetables were absolutely guaranteed to buy it.
You often hear RnB superstars and other singers praising Mariah to the skies. And this is because her voice is incredible. But her mind is absolutely tiny and she's been directly responsible for exploding a genre of music which can be roughly categorised as 'bland RnB'. It's a shame.
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