How to look good/bad in all the best places this Halloween...
Old people are always whining on about Halloween. “Waaaah!” they scream. “These young whippersnappers are always egging our house, asking for funsize Mars bars.” Well whatever, coffin dodgers. Halloween is amazing. You get to eat candy on an industrial scale and you can dress up.
The problem is, what as? Everyone goes as themselves covered in fake blood or thinks a sheet with eye holes cut out has somehow become ironic. Snooze. And, once you've got your costume sorted, where the hell do you go? Beyond the age of about 10, trick or treating stops being fun and just becomes people slamming doors in your face. If you wanted that to happen you'd have become a Jehova's Witness, right?
Fear not fun fans, Spoonfed is here to hold your hands in the darkness this Halloween, lighting the way with a glowing gourd towards the hottest parties and events the capital has on offer (and also giving you a scooby doo at what to wear to them).
For the traditionalists...
Alice Cooper's Halloween Night Of Fear
Aside from Ozzy Osbourne or Marilyn Manson, I can think of no one else in the world who would be more appropriate to spend Halloween with. For Alice Cooper every day is Halloween. Even when he recorded those adverts for Sky with Ronnie Corbett, him and the Corbester probably celebrated a great day's shooting by slaughtering lambs or something. Expect all his usual horror schlock including pretending to be guillotined and simulating sex with mannequins. For his last UK tour, he created the personality of 'Spider', a serial killer who wanted to make an arachnid from the amputated legs of virginal young women.
What to wear?
Boys: Theatrical gothic is the way to go. You can't go wrong as a vampire (but an old school cape and fangs vampire, not one of those pasty whiners from Twilight) If you can convince a snake to come along and act as your scarf for the night, so much the better. Of course, eyeliner is a must. The good news is that there's no need to borrow your girlfriend's as for the last few years Superdrug have stocked a range of guyliner and manscara.
Girls: Three words – zombie school girl. This is an easy look (short skirt and shirt, a tie if you're feeling especially plucky) and also means you can reference Alice's hit song 'School's Out For Summer'. Plus you can wear knee high socks and plimsolls and be bang on trend.
For the punks...
Beach Creep Halloween
Ask anyone who grew up riding a skateboard what Halloween means to them, and you'll get two words in response: The Misfits. Looking like undead bikers and playing fast as hell hardcore punk, this band pretty much invented horror punk single handed.
The Shacklewell Arms knows this, that's why they've only gone and booked a full-bored Misfits cover band to play their Halloween party on Friday. The Fiend club will be in full effect.
What to wear?
Girls: Leather. Lots of leather. Basically you want to look like one of the members of the B-52s crossed with Emma Peel from the Avengers.
Boys: Have you seen Jerry Only?
For the ravers...
Electric Minds and secretsundaze present Halloween Asylum Party
Two stalwarts of the London underground party scene join forces tonight for a Halloween special. Dolan Bergin's Electric Minds team up with James Priestly & Giles Smith's secretsundaze at a secret location to bring all the house and techno anyone could need on their weekend.
Even better, the theme is a mental asylum, which is one of the most reliably awesome Halloween party themes ever.
What to wear?
Boys/girls: OK we have two or three options here. The first couple are fairly obvious, you can go as the either the derranged doctors looking after the hospital or as some of the isntitutes more testing cases. If you want to go for any of these, simply crab a lab coat or some pyjamas, find a real menacing looking weapon in a joke shop and then cake yourself in fake blood. Simple as that, really.
A more left-field option is to get a few mates together and go as the Scooby Gang. It'll take a bit more work, and there will be arguments over who is going as Fred and Daphne, but imagine the laughs you'll get when a whole dance-floor of vampires, zombies, warewolves and people in bedsheets decide to chase you round the place. Amazing.
For the credit crunchers...
If you find yourself maxxed out then why not have a wander round some graveyards, drink a couple of cans of White Lightning and then go watch 'The Human Centipede'? They've even brought out a sequel!
What to wear?
Convince your mates to form a human centipede with you. If you get enough, you might even be able to be the human millipede. Fingers crossed you don't get thrown out of the Odeon.
Happy Halloween folks!
Photos come cortesy of Liz West, Paul Stevenson, Erik Abderhalden and Mollypop. Scooby Doo comes courtesy of the Cartoon Network.
Please check out all our Halloween events in London. There's absoultely loads.
Add an event