I have a 22-year-old cousin who turns into an absolute twit when he parties. I went bar-hopping with him after another cousin's wedding reception last year and ended up feeling thoroughly embarrassed by his behaviour. Your average middle-class mama's boy three years into his undergrad at a reputable uni suddenly morphed into an uncultured tool, throwing one-liners at girls, breaking into obnoxious moves on the dance floor, and getting into verbal spats with other guys. 'What is wrong with people?' he complained, unable to understand that the snickers and eye-rolls he elicited were perfectly justified.
My cousin would feel right at home at Gouranga's Friday night party at Lightbox.
The Vauxhall nightspot, discreetly located under railway arches, is divided into a spacious garden and two intimate rooms featuring impressive LED displays and lighting effects. It's neither too big nor too small, boasts a solid sound system, and consistently draws acclaimed international acts (Kevin Saunderson, Fabrizio Maurizi and Minilogue, to name a few). Why it's attracting a sleazy party crowd, then, is beyond me.
Legendary British producer Trevor Jackson is putting on an eclectic techno set in the main room, yet everyone's crammed into the second room, swaying to commercial electro house (Daft Punk samples, check, sped-up bass-heavy La Roux remix, check). It occurs to me that while the people around me might be perfectly functional in their day-to-day lives, something about it being Friday night compels them to don their tackiest Kanye-inspired eye-wear and embark on a showcase of pure dumbassery. A cluster of polo shirt-wearing guys to my right cannot be bothered to exercise discretion in their party habits, while a large group of Latin American girls to my left are spilling out of their outfits and stumbling over impractically big heels.
I join the five people dancing to Jackson's set; it's a lamentable scene. After a while I approach the DJ booth, rendered all the more accessible due to the sparsity of people, and lean in. 'My colleague Rose interviewed you yesterday,' I remark. 'I'm enjoying your set.'
The curly-haired dark-featured Jackson gives me a wan smile. 'Thanks, but where's the bass? That's why no one's dancing.' He has a point – just the fact that I can speak to him at all is testament to this.
A former Gouranga resident who I get to talking to concurs. 'They're not making full use of the bass speakers,' he observes with a shrug.
'What about the crowd – are they always like this?' I ask.
'You get some bad elements, sure, but there's a good vibe when you're with friends and know people, plus it's great to be able to catch good DJs in such an underground setting.'
Yes, but as true as that is it's also a buzzkill when other revellers don't appreciate the person giving his all at the decks.
Newcomer Helge Kuhl, who takes over after Jackson, likewise suffers from a crowd that prefers the bassline riffs and fidget house beats being blasted in room two (although they're a vast improvement on the trite electro house). The German DJ delivers a very danceable set of solid techno that doesn't deserve being snubbed.
The final headliners of the night, tech-house duo Spektre, are the only main act that manages to generate real interest instead of indifference. I'm able to shrug off all the sweaty guys in shirts and get fully into the music; I even excuse a spaced-out girl spilling beer on me. Three cheers to dirty London clubbing!
But why are the boys from Leeds able to rile the crowd up, where Jackson and Kuhl have failed? The former resident explains it as such: 'These guys have been bigged up for months – they've been topping the Beatport charts, you see.' So the Lightbox crowd, when not simply undiscerning, is actually snobbish? If your deejaying skills aren't backed up by recent success on the online electronic charts, you might as well not bother it seems.
To their credit, Spektre are very good. Their steady, rich flow of tech-house is seamlessly mixed with perfectly-timed breaks and build-ups. They don't mash up genres or employ vocal samples, two things I usually like, but their deep, bassy techno is completely absorbing. Their set is a celebratory one to boot, as they've just been recognised as Best Live Techno by Gouranga's GAG Awards.
When I get home at past 6 in the morning, I feel it's been a strange night. Not bad, per se, but not great. Thinking about it makes me crave a really good club night sometime soon. Here's to hoping Contakt, the M-nus show at the O2 Academy Brixton next weekend (which I'll be reviewing), delivers just that.
Click here to read Rose's interview with Trevor Jackson.
Click here to read Rose's interview with Spektre.
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