Sarah Kendell talks elephants and Bob Marley with the comedy circuit's biggest wild card.
Talking to Boothby Graffoe is a bit like sitting next to your eccentric uncle at Christmas lunch when you were a kid. He'd pull a penny from behind your ear with a mischievous wink, tell you jokes that had the other adults going, “Jim, stop that!” and generally act the fool, but you secretly loved him for it. In a style befitting his profession, the 48-year-old comedian finds it hard to take any subject in our interview too seriously, particularly when he finds out I'm from Australia.
“I find Australians always have the same expression on their face when they get off the plane here”, he says, “It's slightly quizzical.” Adopting a Steve Irwin-style Aussie accent, he does his best impression of a first-timer to old Blighty. “Jesus, Mum was right! Anywhere else IS shit.”
A cult legend on the UK circuit, Graffoe has been writing and performing stand-up and some of the most inspired comedic songs in existence since the '80s. In 2007, he announced his retirement from comedy, and apart from a few one-off gigs, hasn't been seen live since. Luckily, this Easter marks one of those rare occasions where Graffoe comes out of hiding – he's performing a one-night-only show at Leicester Square Theatre on the first night of the long weekend, which, appropriately enough, is April Fool's Day.
“I think it's just a crisis of confidence effect from time to time”, Graffoe says of his reluctance towards the spotlight. “I was always amazed by Bob Marley – he used to smoke 40 spliffs a day at his height, and he stood there in front of 100,000 people. I wonder if he ever looked up and thought, 'My God, what the hell am I doing?'”
When I ask what drew him to this gig though, Graffoe manages to talk serious for at least a few minutes. The show, which also features improvisational maestro Phil Kay and '90s comedy legend Kevin Eldon, is being presented by comedy magazine The Fix, which Graffoe can't speak highly enough of.
“It reminds me of America in the '50s, when writers would get the chance to just tell stories”, he says. “It's one of the rare places you can go to really write stuff. There isn't a market for it because everybody wants 150, 200 words these days, but with The Fix you can pretty much waffle on.”
Waffling is a favourite pastime for Graffoe, who started off in acting in the '70s before deciding he liked talking over the top of people too much to succeed in it. “I'm just not very good at working with other people”, he admits. “I can't let anybody speak. I have to keep butting in.”
Luckily, he found comedy easy to get into because of the abundance of painful nightclub slots that needed filling. “I got a load of gigs that nobody else wanted. Disco bars where they had thumping music playing and for 10 minutes it would stop and they'd just throw you on. I said to one guy, 'How long do you want me on for, half an hour or 45 minutes?' He said, 'You won't last 10.' I lasted, but only to spite him.”
From humble beginnings, Graffoe graduated to his own shows on BBC Radio 4, an appearance on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and several tours with Canadian band The Barenaked Ladies. He's most famous for his hilarious comedic songs (sample titles – 'Kittens in a Bag', 'Umbrella Head Boy'), the inspiration for which he credits to moments of sheer boredom.
“I just sit on me own and think”, he explains, “When I was in New Zealand once, the hotel I was in was on about the fourth floor with a view over the expressway. I remember it pouring down with rain and baseball on the telly. So I wrote a song called 'Baseball-Playing Spider'. Yep, Bob Dylan wrote 'Sad-Eyed Lady of the Lowlands' at the Chelsea Hotel, I wrote 'Baseball-Playing Spider' in... I don't remember what the hotel was called, actually. It might have been a Ramada.”
While Graffoe may not be planning any other live shows in the near future, he is in fact working on some new material. I can exclusively reveal that Graffoe's new song is about...an elephant.
“There was this German geezer in the news for a bit”, he explains, “He was working at a circus and they accused him of not looking after his elephants very well, so he buggered off with one of them. He was missing for nearly a month and nobody saw him. The funny part is, they eventually caught him at the airport. Can you imagine? Standing in customs with the elephant, saying, “What do you mean you forgot your passport?” It's a lovely image, isn't it?”
It certainly is.
Boothby Graffoe and the April Fools will be at Leicester Square Theatre on April 1st.
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