Sarah Kendell chats to the Guardian columnist about teaching Dizzee Rascal science and why she and Susan Boyle are the same.
What do Susan Boyle and an award-winning Guardian columnist and comedian have in common? Quite a lot, apparently. So says Shazia Mirza, who, like the Britain's Got Talent star, is quite the late bloomer when it comes to men and isn't that bothered about saying so. As we sit sipping our morning beverages at a coffee shop in Finchley, the comedian admits that at the age of 31, she's in a serious relationship for the first time in her life. Like Boyle, it's a fact that those around her were a lot more concerned about than herself.
“When she came on Britain's Got Talent and said, 'I'm 46 and I've never been kissed', they made it such a big thing, like, 'Oh, poor woman'”, she recalls. “Actually, she seemed pretty okay with it. It was like that for me - I was always really happy with my life and my career. It's just that I've only now happened to meet a man who I really like.”
The experience of being in a couple for the first time – and the fact that her beloved is an Irish atheist, a fact that doesn't always gel smoothly with her committed Muslim background – will form the basis for Mirza's new Edinburgh show, Multiple Choice. Despite the ongoing hype surrounding the 'biggest arts festival in the world', however, Mirza is quick to admit that the Fringe doesn't exactly draw the same thrill from comedy performers as it does from fans. “No matter what anyone says, everybody hates Fringe”, she says. “Spending a whole month with people talking about themselves and my show and how funny I am, it really drains you. It's bad enough sometimes going to Torquay in the car with three other comedians!”
Mirza initially got into comedy by accident rather than conscious choice, although she followed the same path into the industry as legends French and Saunders and Victoria Wood – teaching at a really awful secondary comprehensive. “The kids were so rough – they were 16-year-old boys who wanted to be rappers and footballers. They used to go, 'Miss, this lesson is shit. Why don't you just leave?' So in order to keep them interested for an hour, I had to be really entertaining and control them.” The experience left the comedian with a natural talent for grabbing and maintaining audience attention – and also allowed her to pick up the odd famous fan. “I used to teach Dizzee Rascal – he still calls me 'Miss' and he's 24, it's really embarrassing. He'll say to me, 'Miss, you making jokes about me, man?' I'm like, 'Of course! Your bad behaviour was the reason I got into comedy, of course I'm going to make jokes about you!'”
During her early years in the circuit, Mirza's claim to fame was being the first Muslim woman stand-up ever, an image she played up to with the inevitable terrorist jokes (example: “Hi, my name's Shazia Mirza – at least that's what it says on my pilot's licence.”) Although the suicide bomber shtick earned her considerable media attention and even a profile on 60 Minutes in the US, the comedian admits she wasn't really being true to herself in performing such material. “I talked about that stuff because I thought, 'Oh, that's what people want to hear.' It's a bit like when young guys start and they all talk about wanking – they're like, 'Oh, wanking's in, I better talk about that.' But actually, the great comedians talk about the truth of their life. Terrorism is not true to me – I talk about much broader stuff now because my life is about so many other things.”
Mirza's current material is certainly reflective of that desire to speak the truth and surprise her audience more – like when she talks about her new honorary mum, the Queen. “I was invited to Buckingham Palace to meet her this year and she spoke to me for about 20 minutes about where I was performing next, what kind of material I did, what my favourite venue was. She was more interested in my career than my own mother!” Typically, the Duke of Edinburgh was slightly less PC about the whole affair. “There were a lot of Indians in, so he said, 'Oh, there's a lot of Patels today!'”, she laughs. “The Sun was ringing me up wanting to know if I was offended. I thought it was amazing!”
Shazia Mirza: Multiple Choice will preview at the Royal Vauxhall Tavern on July 1st, 27th and 28th.
Photo credit: Martin Twomey
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